I had an interesting day yesterday

Yesterday was Vacaville's Merriment on Main
and I had a pretty good time serving up some hot chocolate (with marshmellows) to the public. Our church does it every year, amongst many other organizations that offer free snacks and drinks during the tree lighting. It's a fun time of meeting new people, serving the community and reconnecting with old acquaintances.

Anyhow, why am I writing about this little memory in a blog where I normally keep the topics to economics, politics and religion? Well, to be honest, the blogging became more of an obligation towards the end of summer. I did it because I made a goal of 3 blogs a week for 2009. The first quarter was fun and exciting as most new things are. However, somewhere during the summertime I lost my desire to write about things I am passionate about and it became a burden.

Additionally, I started this blog to express my thoughts about life and many of my friends starting commenting about how they enjoyed the banters, sarcasm and the like. I felt like I was contributing to my little portion of the world. It was fun and I was stirring up so much conversation about topics I love.

I think things started to change when I found myself pissing off people who normally don't talk to me. It was a little weird at first to hear an old high school acquaintance on Facebook come out of the abyss to rant on a post. I thought, well, at least I know them a little better than I did before. Who cares that the only reason I know them better now was because they felt they had to correct me on a position they knew nothing about in the first place. Se la vi right?

Then, all of a sudden, I think it became about drawing people out of the private places they hide their political affiliations and religious bigotry to find out what they really did believe. I am convinced that this is where I may have gone wrong. You see, I became burnt out because I began to believe the purpose of my writing was to stimulate debate and discussion. I realize now that this is only a byproduct of my writing. Add to this that I believed my friends were enjoying my writing and finding it of value, but I had not heard anyone comment or even refute some of what I wrote during the summer. We all enjoy the feedback concerning the things we invest ourselves in.

Recently, I had two friends I haven't seen in a long while tell me they appreciated what I wrote and asked me if I was still blogging. Although my face never showed it, I was deeply touched that in the little time we spoke on Parker Street they asked me about the very writing I abandoned because I thought no one was reading it and I was writing for the wrong reasons. Then it dawned on me...Go back to the basics of doing it because you enjoy it. Address the controversial because that is who you are.

I stir the pot not because that is who I am. I don't need to worry about making sure that I do it. I just need to write my thoughts and let the chips fall as they may. All you clean freaks will understand this: Have you ever walked into a room that was not yours and picked up an article of clothing to place it neatly in an appropriate place? Or maybe leveled that friend's picture frame because it was off even though no one seemed to notice? You like order and cleanliness; so much so, that you do it naturally everywhere you go.

We should all find out what we love and get good at it. How can I get better at communicating how I feel about life if I don't do it? Likewise, you should do the same. Find that thing that makes you tick and do it. And not just do it, but do it well