From Abram to Churchill in 5 steps or less

All across the world the masses are attending church services, and being in Canada it seems they have a church or two as well. Today, it was the Church of Christ in Gravelbourg, Saskathewan, Canada. That is a mouthful.

The sermon was an exposition in Genesis where God changes Abram's name to Abraham and tells him he will have a son at 100 years old. The sermon was really good, actually, but I will keep this blog limited to a single epiphany (I know, you're amazed I have these).

Reflect on the old adage,

"Some are born great, some achieve greatness, and others have greatness thrust upon them." -William Shakespeare

This is mostly misleading and ultimately irresponsible. The way this is phrased leads us to believe that uncontrollable factors like genetics and destiny determine a man's greatness. Whereas, the reality is, great men are defined by the difficult decisions they make in historic times. Let me elaborate.

Adolf Hitler and his deplorable holocaust presented us with a recent historical example to prove this point. Two men met this opportunity, but only one was made great by it.

Neville Chamberlin was Britan's Prime Minister from 1937-1940 and although he was welcomed with tremendous applause after the negotiation of The Munich Agreement with Hitler, he will not be remembered by anything other than his policy of appeasement and the failure it was.

Winston Churchill, on the other hand, recognized Hitler for what he was and refused to believe his lies. Many remember his inspiring speeches but his legacy began with his years of isolation as a dissenter against Chamberlin's policies.

History doesn't shine brightly upon those who intend well, but those who act well. And in order to act well, a leader must be able to protect his people from the appetite of tyrants or entities that lust for power. However, without Hitler, Churchill may not be considered an example of resilience and resolute conviction.

Likewise, we cannot expect to possess tremendous faith nor be considered truly courageous unless we face opportunities to compromise these qualities. For example, courage is defined as "mental or moral strength to venture, persevere, and withstand danger, fear, or difficulty." Also, if one does not withstand danger, fear or difficulty the negative trait of cowardice can be applied. Difficult situations present opportunities for men to choose greatness, or choose infamy.

I suppose Shakespeare should have said, "All have difficulties, some choose to act rightly and have greatness thrust upon them.

Team Diabetes?

I'm sitting there watching the life changing movie The Mummy when it goes to commercial. My mind still blown by the acting that is Brendan Fraiser, I wasn't thinking rationally.

The next thing I know, I'm laughing at a fake commercial about Canada's Team Diabetes...

Now, I'm crying because the commercial isn't fake. Or was I crying because I was still laughing? I don't know, judge for yourself.



So I was preparing this blog and overheard two words in the other room that would get the attention of any human who has an Intelligence of 6 or more...inverted nipple.

Don't laugh! This is a real problem, according to Marsha Walker, a RN & IBCLC (International Board Certified Lactation Consultant, yes, she can help you foreign lactators to), 7%-10% of pregnant women suffer from a concave teat.

If this wasn't enough, I did a little research into embarrassing conditions that were inverted. There are too many to list here, but I have found a better cause to get behind than Team Diabetes. How about TEAM INVERTED COLON? This is not a joke.

Now this is a problem I can get behind...on second thought...

Ever get a backrub from your mother-in-law?

Intrigued? Mortified? I suppose that depends on the old lady.

My wife's mom is back in school to become a massage therapist and apparently, in Canada, that requires a very intensive 2-yr course that isn't for the faint of heart or lazy of butt. I guess she has a good heart and firm gluts.

She needs some people to work on, and naturally, I couldn't refuse a free massage. For those of you who need to focus, the important word in the last sentence was free. I don't spend money, at least not on purpose.

However, there is a cost I didn't consider; a price which may make the weak shutter. Me, I just thought, "Well, she's gonna see my butt crack some day. Why not while she's rubbing my half-naked body with soft and smooth mineral oils." I felt like a greek king...well, at least a greek king who gets oiled up. I suppose some grapes would have been more appropriate.

Some bridges in-laws never really get an opportunity to cross. Not me, we paid that toll proudly and in the process I learned more about human anatomy, relaxing in a cold basement, and my coccyx.

Got any stories with your mammy-in-law to top this one?